WARNING: Adult Material. Adult Content. Adult Language. Adult Theme.
Note: The names are fictitious…and refer to no actual person. It is just a story! Enjoy!
In every group there is one person that doesn’t like to talk about sex…and in the farting college women Sandy is that person. In this episode Sandy finds herself all alone in the apartment. Beth and Lusta Golden are out on a date, and Mandy well she is working. Sandy finds herself surfing a dating site called…”I bet I can tell you a lie about my cheating self”. She looks through several guys photos, and finds a guy that she might want to meet.
Sandy: I wish Mandy and Beth were home. I am sure lonely. I think I will turn on my computer and look for a friend. Hey, I am a women with needs. Let me do a search…hmmmm this site looks good “I bet I can tell you a lie about my cheating self”. I better take a shower. I am so hot and sweaty. I will go back to the computer after I get out.
Sandy takes off her clothes and jumps in the shower. The water feels good against her soft skin. She washes her body, and then gets out. She wraps herself in a towel, and turns on the TV.
TV Commerical: (women’s sexy voice) Are you looking for love? Have you been dumped…or has someone taken a dump on you? Do you want to meet the love of your life…or at least a love right now? What are you waiting for logon to “I bet I can Tell you a lie about my cheating self”. We promise you will find love in two seconds, because we know you are desperate as hell…and will do anything to find love even if it means lying about it. We don’t care if you have been married seven times, or are a psycho. All we care about is the money…and as long as you pay your bill…we won’t tell the world about your dirty fucked up past. We believe that everyone deserves a second chance, and a third chance, and a fourth chance…at love.
Here are two members that found love…Jack…and…Jane.
Jack: I was lonely, but when I logged on to I bet I can tell you a lie about my cheating self, I found love in just two seconds. Hell, I didn’t know that she was an addict, and had been married five times.
Jane: Jack has become my obsession. I just can’t get him out of my mind, even though he is fifty- thousand dollars in debt with credit cards and been married ten times. Get over here…I need love Jack. I need love! Here Jack do you want to suck my tits…what about my ass! You want to suck my ass don’t you, then I am going shit on your face Jack because it is a symbol of love and trust Jack.
Jack: No, I don’t want to suck your tits or your ass! I want out of here! Please someone help me, she is sticking her ass on my nose! Oh, it smells…it smells!!! Oh, she is taking a crap on my face!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Jane: You are making me cum Jack!
Sexy woman’s Voice: See that is pure passion. Jane wants to give him love, and she wants him to show it by sucking her ass and letting her drop a big shit on his face. They are so cute together. And trust me there are no psychos here, because we check each an every member out…oops I lied (he, he, he, he, he, he). We are only in it for the money, so sign up no matter who you are, he, he, he, he, woo ha, ha!! Oh, I guess you could lie, but why when you can have true love today. So join people like Jack and Jane and find good old fashion love today.
Sandy: That looks like an interesting site…I might join it today. I need a username, and then setup my profile. Then the men will know that I am lonely and want a man. Wait didn’t Beth say something about those dating sites?
Beth (voice dream like echoing): What the fuck are you doing going to those dating sites? Those sites will make you blind…there are fucking people on there that make politicians look like saints…lying psychos.
Sandy: I guess I could use my credit card just this time. Beth isn’t home anyway, and besides I am a grown woman. I can take care of myself.
Sandy gets a username, and creates a profile, and in fifteen minutes she has thirty replies from men all over the world. She just blushes, and looks at all men that have sent messages to her.
Sandy: Womanseeker12345, that looks like a nice guy, and he lives in the same city as me. He says that he likes to workout and likes quiet evenings alone under the covers with wine…and stuff. He also says that he is looking for the woman of his dreams, and he is honest and sincere. I will e mail him back…I sure hope that I don’t open up a can of worms. I have to ask myself this question…if he is honest and sincere then how come he is listed on this site, and is not with anyone hmmmmm?
Just as Sandy is finishing her message to womenseeker12345_AD Mandy comes home. Sandy doesn’t want anyone knowing about her conquest.
Mandy: Sandy, I am home!! What are you doing?
Sandy: Nothing…oh nothing. I am just surfing the Internet for beauty products!
Mandy: I didn’t just see you looking at a dating site? You know what happened to me…it was terrible.
Sandy: I just sent off a message to a guy who calls himself womenseeker12345_AD he is a real dream boat.
Mandy:You know better than to be communicating with a man that calls himself womanseeker12345…he probably is a shit bomb.
Sandy: You don’t know anything about my man! He is sincere and honest. Does that sound like anyone that is a shit bomb? Well…does it!
Mandy: Yes, I am afraid so…Sandy. I am afraid so…
Sandy runs to her room. Mandy runs after her.
Mandy: Sandy…I am sorry. I am just watching out for you. You know that love is dangerous. I just don’t want you to get hurt.
Sandy: Please, go fuck yourself Mandy. Why is it that you and Beth always get the dates and I don’t? You fucking bitches.
Mandy: Your question comes in two parts. Part one, I am going to my room and I am going to fuck myself with my new Vibrator with pulsating head, and I am going to cum…five times. The other part of your question is you have always been the one that watches out for us…so it is time that Beth and I watch out for you.
Sandy: Thank you…Mandy! But, I need to make my own mistakes. I need to reach out and get my own sunshine or darkness which ever comes my way.
Mandy: I am still going to watch out for you. Well, I am going to my room, and getting naked and sticking my new Vibrator up my love hole, and cumming all night long.
Sandy: OK…see you later.
Mandy: Later…bitch!
Mandy goes to her room and shuts the door. Beth comes running through the door all pissed off.
Beth: Those fucking pharmaceutical bastards!
Sandy: What are you pissed off about?
Beth: Lusta, Golden and I were having a nice dinner, when one of my friends came over to us and told us about the tragedy in his life. He needs medicine and his insurance will not pay for it. He is real sick. The medicine costs three hundred dollars a bottle. The damn insurance company and that pharmaceutical company are fucking each other and we the consumers are getting their leftover cum juice. I am going to do something about this…
Sandy: What do you want me to do about it, companies have more power than me. I am just a poor college student…with no insurance.
Beth: I want to vent. The only people that can pay for certain medicines are the rich people. The rest of us have to suffer. Damn this world is so unfair.
Sandy: You know the world is ruled by pharmaceutical companies, and companies that are in it for the money. They give out the medicines and we pay…it is just as simple as that.
Mandy: Oh, fuck you have big cock! Oh…I fucking love it! Give it to me! Give it to me…yeah that is it!!
Beth: What the fuck is that?
Sandy: It is Mandy fucking herself with her electronic fuck stick!
Beth: Mandy would you shut up I am venting here.
Sounds come from Mandy’s room.
Mandy: Oh! YEAH! YEAH! OH…FUCK I AM CUMMING!!! Shut…up…Beth!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! OHHHHHHHHHHH! YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Beth: Mandy…keep your lust to yourself. I am talking to Sandy.
Sandy: There is nothing that we can do…it seems that money takes the place of life…it seems that companies have all the say. We are just seen as paying customers to their plans of world domination. I don’t have time to talk to you. I am waiting for a phone call.
Beth: Sandy? What is wrong…a phone call from who?
Sandy: A guy.
Beth: Sandy…do you have a date?
Sandy:Yeah, he seems pretty nice. He likes to workout, and spend quiet evenings under the covers, and wants to find the woman of his dreams.
Beth: That sounds like a canned document profile on some dating site from a desperate man. You haven’t met him in person…have you?
Sandy: No…I haven’t but he will be emailing me soon. He seems really nice. Don’t say anything, Mandy has already told me about online dating sites.
Beth: I am not going to argue with you about that. You are a grown woman!
Sandy: Why did you come home so soon if it wasn’t to tell me that I am a bad woman for going to a dating site.
Beth: I came back here for a change of clothes, I am spending the night at Lusta Golden’s house. We are going to do some dancing in the sheets…if you know what I mean.
Sandy: Sounds pretty serious…I wish I were dancing in the sheets. You must be in love.
Mandy (from her room): Buy a vibrator…no fuss all the lust with no drama, and no mess in the sheets. And you won’t have to clean love juice off your tits, or ass or belly or face or hair or…!
Beth: Shut up Mandy we get the point! Yes, I am in love.
Mandy: Oh, Beth come back to bed! I want to see your pussy!
Beth: Shut up Mandy…don’t make me come back there and spank you!
Mandy: Oh, that would be nice…lover!
Bath: I am not listening…Mandy! Well, I will see you…be careful Sandy! I will give you this advice: If he wants to do you on the first date, or if he wants to make you feel sorry for him and then do you on the first date..send him home packing. He only wants one thing.
Sandy: Yes, I will take your advice.
Beth walks back to her room and gets her clothes, and tells Mandy and Sandy goodbye. The door closes and all is quiet. Sandy goes to her room and watches some TV. In an hour or so, Sandy gets an email from womenseeker12345_AD! The messages reads:
Hello Sandy. I have been wanting a woman like you. Meet me at Club Scratch tomorrow night for a good time…I well be waiting. I will be in a blue suit and tie. Womenseeker12345_AD
The feeling of lust filled Sandy’s Mind. She is excited. She is glad that she has a date even if she got it using a dating site. But, then she questions his message…why hadn’t he used his real name? And why did he want to meet at club Scratch. That place is a restaurant, but it is known for it’s dancers of the night that are dressed like cats. The top half is of their suit looks like a cat, but they don’t wear anything from the waist down.
Sandy went to bed that night thinking about the date. The next day she went to class, and came home and got ready for the night out. The day had gone by really slow, and the anticipation was too much to bare. There was no one at home. Beth was at work, and Mandy was in class. She had no one to talk to…about the date.
She took a taxi to club Scratch which as about twelve blocks from the apartment. The cab left her in front of the Club. She paid the cover charge, and went to the restaurant side. The music was loud, and the place was full. She looked around and didn’t see anyone wearing a blue suit and tie. Then one of the waitresses came up to Sandy and told her to come with her. The waitress had a cat mask on and cat top, but nothing on below her waist. Sandy was at a nude bar.
Sandy followed the waitress to a private booth and there he was womanseeker12345_AD. It was Rick Landerson…a politician running for public office. He had two other women setting next to him…half naked. She knew this date was too good to be true.
Rick Landerson: Hello…Sandy! I hope this place is to your liking! We have been waiting for you! You see I have to have release. I have a huge schedule of ass kissing the public, and well women are my…release. Come over here and give me some sugar.
The two women laugh!
Sandy: You are married! Why are you doing this? You are a pig! You lie to the public, and you lie to your wife! I am leaving… you bastard.
Rick Landerson:Oink. Oink. Lover! Come back here, my wife is out doing charity work, she doesn’t give me loving anymore (ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!) She knows nothing about being poor, she wants everyone to think that she cares. The more charity she does the more voters I get…it is a symbiotic relationship. Where are you going Sandy? Stay…please! I wouldn’t want you going public with what you already know!
The three laugh!
Sandy: Don’t fuck with me I am a member of the farting college women and we get each others back!
Rick Landerson: Oh…whatever! You three are just an urban legion! Come here and sit down! I have ordered fish eggs and salad for everyone with tax payers money! Damn I am smooth! You will stay for dinner…Sandy! You and your middle class paid for it! (ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha)
Sandy: You can’t do this…I am not your piece of property! I am human being unlike you!
Rick Landerson: Tonight you belong to me! You see we politicians paint an image that is squeaky clean and immortal. People look up to us like we are super human, and that we are flawless. To my public I am flawless…I am so fucking cool! I am so above the law! I am so fucking rich!
Sandy: I will stay with you!
Rick Landerson: That is a good woman! I need your cell phone…you will get it back when I have brainwashed you into believing that infidelity is king! Tonight when you leave you will be a voter (ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha).
Sandy presses the farting college women distress button when she hands Rick Landerson her phone.
Sandy: I don’t think so…Dick!
Rick Landerson: Come over here and sit with me! I want you to meet someone! This is Edwin my body guard! If you try any funny stuff he will stop you! He will stop you (ha, ha, ha, ha)!
Sandy: Oh, that piece of crap. He is a coward stalking psycho ass! He dated my friend Mandy once and he won’t stop calling! He says that she is the love of his life, and they only went out once. He even cries on the phone!
Edwin: I have changed now! I am not the man that I used to be…well that is what my profile says at “I lie to get love and I can’t tell the truth”.
Rick Landerson: I take you know him.
Edwin: I had to go to counseling because of her friend Beth…she farted on me! But, I am all good now!
Rick Landerson: So, Sandy is a member of the Farting College Women…she isn’t lying! Where are you other friends Sandy? They can’t help you now….give me sugar! I want you to get me off!
Rick unzips his pants. The other two women start kissing each other, and Rick Landerson directs Sandy to please him. Sandy looks around and sees Beth, Mandy and Lusta Golden. Mandy has the video camera that is connected via a wireless connection to the local media. Beth and Lusta Golden confront Rick Landerson.
Beth: Not, so fast Rick Landerson! You zip up your pants before there is hell to pay!
Rick Landerson: Hell, I have been there. I have sold myself to the highest bidder…I am slut to power and money! Money and control! Edwin get them!
Edwin: Yes, sir!
Edwin runs at Mandy, but doesn’t far!
Mandy: You are poor excuse for a man Edwin. You suck…your dick is so small that you have to have a flea get you off!
Edwin: Shut up Mandy…my cock is the biggest you will ever see!
Mandy: No it’s not!
Edwin: Yes, it is…ahhhhhhh!
Edwin walks away!
Rick Landerson: Edwin get back here, and get in the flight man. Am, I going to have to do this alone!
Beth: It looks like it… you bastard. We have all this on film: you trying to get someone to service you…now you must pay! And you are not going to get any change back!
Rick Landerson: I can get the tape! You have nothing on me!
Mandy: Yes, we do! We had a live feed right to the studio! Your career as a public official is finished. Your wife is on the way..she knows about your slut “adventures”.
The two half naked women sitting on Rick Landerson’s lap get up a scurry to the door and leave.
Rick Landerson:What are you going to do? I can pay you all…beyond your wildest dreams!
Beth: It isn’t time to pay us…it is time to pay up!
Rick Landenson: What are you doing? What are you doing…you are taking your pants off! No! I will be good!
Beth: I know you will be! I know you will be (ha, ha, ha, ha)
Beth Removes her pants and sits on Rick Landersons nose…and you all know what happens next!
Rick Landerson: please…all I wanted was a little release. I just wanted Sandy to give me a good time!
Beth: You wanted wrong…now I am going to fart on your face.
Rick Landerson: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Beth’s Ass:ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!! POOOO!
SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
IIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!! BBBBBBBaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Rick Landerson: It smells…it smells! It burns!!! It burns!!!
Beth: My work is finished here! Let’s go watch a movie..ladies!
Sandy: Yeah..
Mandy: Yes, I agree!
Lusta Gold: Yes…I would love to see a movie!
The whole club stinks, so everyone left until the smell cleared! Rick is rushed to the hospital with burns on his face and head. They also had to surgically remove a piece of corn that got stuck in his face, because Beth’s ass reached terminal velocity! He is also getting counseling for his traumatic experience. His wife left him and his career is washed out!
FIN!
